Love Your Mother, or Else!

River Shmiver! Source

Listen, I’m as green as the next guy. OK, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. Do I care about the polar bears? Sure. Do I care enough to alter my life significantly? ::Looking around:: No. There, I said it. And while I’m at it, on most days, I don’t recycle. I only understand the rules for paper, everything else is just too complicated. Yes, I know, shame on me. But while I’m on the pulpit, I might as well speak the truth. And the truth is, I have a bone to pick with the “green” squad. The bottom line is this, if it is too inconvenient to be “green,” I won’t do it. I can’t be alone in this thinking. Yes, it’s awful and selfish and mean but true nonetheless.

Here’s an example. I bought a condo fairly recently with energy-efficient appliances and I’ll tell you what - I prefer my mom’s old school energy burning washer/dryer to the energy efficient dryer that leaves my clothes damp after 3 hours ANY DAY. It’s an inconvenience. How am I supposed to WANT to save the Earth when that means that laundry day turns into laundry WEEK?

In my defense, I am a little green. I don’t own a car by choice. I take public transportation, walk, or carshare to get where I have to go. That counts for something, right? Though it can get sticky sometimes, there’s something in it for me - I save a LOT of money this way.

There must be enough of us what’s-in-it-for-me types walking the streets of DC for the District to take action. On January 1, 2010, DC instituted a plastic bag fee of $.5 for EACH plastic bag a customer uses at any establishment that sells food or liquor.

::pausing while you digest that::

::raising eyebrows for dramatic effect::

Mmhmm. You like Target? Bag tax. You like groceries? Bag tax. You like ordering carry-out for lunch? Bag tax. How about taking a doggie BAG when you leave a restaurant? Bag tax. Picking up wine for the party? Bag tax.

You can avoid the tax by bringing your own bag(s) or foregoing the bag(s) altogether. While I understand the goal is to alter behavior and force us to consider if we really do need that plastic bag, I have a few real issues with this.

The other day, I bought shelving at Target. I had to pay for each of my plastic bags. Even though Target sells food, I did not purchase food, so there is no logic to this to me. And frankly, any reusable bags I have wouldn’t be big enough for the shelves.

Also, we car-less folks are at a disadvantage. If I had a car, I could keep 10 bags in it in case I decide to go grocery shopping, I can just whip them out. But I don’t have a car so if I decide on a whim to pick up a few things, I’m paying the bag tax unless I go all the way home to get my bags. On public transportation? No, thanks. Also, if I do purchase larger items (blender, etc) I need a bag to get them home on the train/bus, where as if I had a vehicle I can lug it bag-less to my car then drive home.

The bag tax has helped in that I am aware of my plastic bag usage. But I think it’s inconvenient and darn right unfair sometimes. Any thing ticking you off?